Feeling Happy

I had a very pleasant day today. Co-workers are always in a good mood on Friday. I was especially happy because I knew that I would be on vacation once my workday was complete. Most Fridays I start getting into the weekend mindset at lunch time. One small gift to myself is to always go out for lunch on Fridays. Usually I go with my friend, Wendy, but she is on vacation this week with her family. Today I went out with other co-workers and had a delightful time. It was a beautiful and sunny day. It was warm but not hot. The walk to the restaurant was pleasant. Our lunch was filled with good conversation and laughter. My current work situation is very comfortable. I like my co-workers and I personally have a wonderful staff. After returning to the office I sat at my desk, stared at my computer, and wondered what I would do to make the time pass. Quite unexpectedly my kind boss gave me an early start on my vacation week. I flew out of the office and came home for a couple of hours before picking my wife up at her office. Somewhere in this time I squeezed in a short nap.

Now I sit here in my room feeling happy. Santana is jamming in the background. A cup of coffee perks me up a bit. Tonight and tomorrow will be full of leisure except for some last minute laundry and packing my bags for a trip to the mountains on Sunday. I will be there a few days with my family. Upon my return I will have a few more days of leisure at home. I am feeling a little tired at the moment like I do every workday evening. It's a good tired, however, and one that still anticipates a week of freedom.

I'm sure I will probably write on this blog again before I leave home on Sunday but once I am gone it will be silent for a few days. Sometimes it is a good thing to let the writing rest. On a good day I might have something to say that others enjoy or find helpful. Others days I am empty and it would be best to not try too hard to write something meaningful. I think I will stop now and get lost in Santana's version of Miles Davis's "In a Silent Way". It is simply awesome. The early and original version of Santana was an incredible band who made their national debut at the original Woodstock Festival. I saw them the first time around the time the show I am listening to now from the closing of the Fillmore West in 1971 was recorded. Santana and Miles Davis are personal favorites.

Somedays Are Just Ordinary And A Little Boring

The last two days have started off beautifully with bright sunlight, blue skies, and coolness. They appeared to have the promise of perfect spring days. Both days, however, have also had torrential rainfall in the early afternoons. Many may not think that is part of a perfect day but it is certainly part of a typical spring day in Kentucky. By the time I left work each day the rains were gone and the sunshine had returned. If I didn't work under an atrium and near windows I may not have known it rained either day.

For the last hour or so I have been doing a sleep study in my chair. The results are now in. Apparently, I was just very tired. This is a short work week due to the Memorial Day holiday on Monday. Typically short work weeks always seem much longer than a normal work week. This week is no different. If that's not enough I am on vacation next week so this week my mind is already in the vacation mode. In my mind I am already there. My attempts to be invisible and to fly under the radar are complicated by the fact that I am also very bored at work this week. Truthfully, I am bored at work a lot. Sometimes it is from not having enough to do. However, even doubling my workload would not cure the boredom. I am bored with the tasks that I perform. I've been doing what I do for so long that little challenges me. The workday is made bearable by the interactions I have with friends and co-workers.

Some days are just ordinary and a little boring. Today is such a day. The good news is that I am still happy. Tonight I seize the ordinary and the boring and I turn it into a sleep study. You know how much I love to learn! Well, it's time to go prepare some coffee. Later this coffee will help me wash down some sugar free dessert while I watch the Discovery Channel where a group of highly educated city folks struggle to survive in the Alaskan wilderness. I will consume chocolate pie while they eat porcupine stew.

Contemplative Thoughts

None of us are completely present. So don’t feel guilty, but do know presence is still the great teacher, those enlightened moments that come now and then. When we are manipulating, changing, controlling, and fixing, we are not there yet. We cannot be present to something and trying to change it at the same time.

The calculating mind is the opposite of the contemplative mind. The first is taught by the systems of our world, the second by the Holy Spirit.

We might consider this prayer to try to draw ourselves into a contemplative frame of mind:

Be still and know that I am God.
Be still and know that I am.
Be still and know.
Be still.
Be.

-from Everything Belongs by Richard Rohr, OFM

This will give us some idea of the proper preparation that the contemplative life requires. A life that is quiet, lived in the country, in touch with the rhythm of nature and the seasons. A life in which there is manual work, the exercise of arts and skills, not in a spirit of dilettantism, but with genuine reference to the needs of one's existence. The cultivation of the land, the care of farm animals, gardening. A broad and serious literary culture, music, art, again not in the spirit of Time and Life, but a genuine and creative appreciation of the way poems, pictures, etc., are made. A life in which there is such a thing as serious conversation, and little or no TV. These things are mentioned not with the insistence that only life in the country can prepare a [person] for contemplation, but to show the type of exercise that is needed.

-by Thomas Merton. The Inner Experience: Notes on Contemplation. William H. Shannon, editor (San Francisco: HarperSanFrancisco, 2003): 131.

Visiting My Dad

The long holiday weekend is nearly over. I'm not too upset because I only have to work four days this week and then I am on vacation. Overall, this has been a good weekend. Saturday my wife and I saw "Angels and Demons" which is much better than "The Da Vinci Code". "Angels and Demons" will not challenge anyone's faith, at least it shouldn't. It's little more than a murder mystery with Rome and the Vatican as a backdrop. After the movie we met Chloe and her parents at a local restaurant to celebrate my oldest son's 31st birthday. Having a son in his 30's is a wake up call for me. After dinner my granddaughter came home with my wife and me to spend the night with us. She is nearly five years old and very much her own person. She is the most loving person in my life. She adores me and I adore her. She did, however, throw me under the bus one time. When Granny asked "Who trashed the living room"?, Chloe responded, "Pa Paw"! Last night my family attended a fish fry and shrimp boil at my mother's with most of my extended family. The weather cooperated and everyone seemed to have a very enjoyable time. I am part of a good and large family. They have their quirks and no one, including me, is perfect but I take comfort that I will never be alone in this world. I am now the senior male now that my father has passed on.

This morning my youngest brother picked me up and we went to the cemetery to visit my father's grave. For those that follow my life you may remember that he died on February 11th of this year. Today was my first visit to the cemetery since his funeral. His grave marker is still not there but we know where he is. He is next to an aunt and uncle of mine. Not too far away from my Dad is his mother. It still seems hard to believe that Dad is gone. While we were at the graveside my sister also showed up. In recent years I have felt closer to my siblings. I am glad and also very happy that our family is free of any strained relationships. The rest of my day was spent simply taking it easy. Tomorrow it's back to the rat race or, to quote one of my nieces, the "soul sucking enviroment of corporate life". Well, my work life is not that bad but I know what she means.

It's Going To Be A Long Day

I have been up since 7:30 AM with my granddaughter. Her first words to me this morning were "I've been jumping over flowers". When I asked her about it, she said, "It was a dream, Pa Paw"! It's been a long time since Pa Paw dreamed about jumping over flowers. I would be happy to have a dream where I simply walked through the flowers in a French Impressionist painting.

Chloe and I spent the first 30 minutes of our day sitting in my bathroom observing the three baby birds in the nest on the ledge outside my bathroom window. They were huddled together in the nest and looked like nothing but a pile of feathers. I explained to Chloe that the mommy bird was out getting breakfast for her babies and that we needed to get away from the window so she wouldn't be afraid to return. I finally convinced her to sit with me on the side of the bathtub. As soon as we did that the mommy bird appeared and the baby birds immediately awakened with their heads upward and their mouths wide open. Chloe was fascinated watching the mommy bird feed her babies. After two or three feedings everyone seemed content.

It is overcast outside and there is a good chance it will rain today. Hopefully all the families in this area can still have their cookouts and family get togethers as Americans celebrate Memorial Day. For those of you outside this country Memorial Day is a national holiday in the USA where we honor and remember all those who have died in war. Later today my family will join my extended family for a meal at my mothers house. Tomorrow most people will also get a day off from working.

For now I will enjoy some solitude while brownies bake in the kitchen and fill the house with their aroma. Some quiet Grateful Dead acoustic plays in the background. I think it's time for another cup of coffee. Last week when I was at the monastery I bought a bag of coffee grown by Trappist monks in Venezuela. It's pretty good stuff and I usually only drink it on weekends. It's a quiet morning on the neighborhood and I am enjoying its peacefulness.

Favorite Guitar Players

Tonight I was on Facebook attempting to list my Top Five Guitar Players. It was an impossible task. I still can't do it so I thought I would post a longer list here of some of my favorite guitar players. I have limited this list to guitar players that I have actually seen play live. I could list more but these are the musicians I never grow tired of hearing. Their virtuosity has provided some of the great moments of my life. Yes, I've had great rock and roll experiences in my life. The list speaks for itself.

• Duane Allman and Dickie Betts of the Allman Brothers Band
• Eric Clapton
• Robbie Krieger of the Doors
• Jerry Garcia of the Grateful Dead
  
• Buddy Guy
• Jimi Hendrix
• Joe Walsh
• Jorma Kaukonen of the Jefferson Airplane and Hot Tuna
• Robert Fripp of King Crimson
• Jimmy Page of Led Zeppelin
• Leslie West of Mountain
• Hughie Thomasson and Billy Jones of the Outlaws
• David Gilmour of Pink Floyd
• Carlos Santana
• Alvin Lee of Ten Years After
• Robin Trower
• Toy Caldwell of the Marshall Tucker Band
• Stevie Ray Vaughn
• Pete Townshend of the Who
• Johnny Winter
• Steve Howe of Yes
• Neil Young
• Frank Zappa
  

Chloe's Graduation

Yesterday I left work, picked up my wife at her office, and then proceeded to Chloe's daycare for her graduation ceremony. It was so grown up. All the children wore caps and gowns. After singing a few group songs each child came up to the Director of the daycare to receive a diploma. When Chloe came up to get hers it was announced that she wanted to grow up and work on computers. That's good because Pa Paw screws his computer up on a regular basis! Chloe is moving to the next rung in the ladder of life. After a special summer program she will attend kindergarten in the fall. I cannot believe that she is growing up so fast. If you have been following my life through this blog I don't have tell you which child in the picture above is my granddaughter. At the moment, as I sit hear typing this note, Chloe is upstairs with my wife carefully looking out my bathroom window. On the ledge outside is a robin's nest with three baby birds that we have been observing since we noticed the nest and the three blue eggs that appeared there. This evening Chloe will spend the night and tomorrow we are going to a Memorial Day cook out with all of my family at my mother's house. I just had to chase Chloe out of my room because she ran in here as naked as the little baby birds in the robin's nest. I told her to go get her clothes on and finish watching the SpongeBob Squarepants marathon on television. There's never a dull moment when Chloe is here!