Gratitude

After braving the cold, the darkness, and the morning commute I returned to the warmth and comfort of my home.  As always my neighborhood is a very quiet and solitary place during the work week.  After brewing some African coffee that my wife gave me for Christmas I sat down for my morning meditation.  Although meditation can sometimes be a restless and difficult experience I still enjoy it most of the time.  Think of meditation as going to the gym.  It is a form of spiritual exercise.  It is not always pleasant in the moment but over time it is beneficial.  Of course there are also times when you really enjoy it and feel like you could go on and on.  This morning as I sat in silence I had the thought over and over how grateful I am for these days.  I feel like I am on an extended retreat.  The ice and the snow and the extreme cold increase my sense of isolation.  With all due respect to humanity I am loving my solitude.  Retirement is not a guarantee for everyone so I am exceedingly grateful that I have been given the means and the opportunity to retire from full time working.  Down the road I may venture into part time work or volunteering but for now I have been given the gift of extended and full time retirement.  I have often complained in the past that my life was spent meeting the needs and expectations of other people often to my own detriment and unhappiness.  I think I have earned the right to now be a little selfish and to focus on my own needs.