Simple Pleasures...And A Few That Are Guilty

I love to go to the Mall. I love the sights and sounds and smells. I especially like going there on a work night when the crowds are thin and I have a little money in my pocket. My wife and I decided to give ourselves a little bonus and mine immediately started burning a hole in my pocket so off to the Mall we went. We started off with a gourmet meal at the food court. Even now, after my evening insulin shot, my blood sugar is buzzing from the orange chicken I got on the Chinese buffet. I should have avoided it and opted for the bourbon chicken. After dinner we parted ways and each of us headed out to indulge in whatever pleasures our money would buy us. I made a bee line for the music store where I quickly unloaded some of my cash. I completed my collection of all the Rolling Stones remasters along with an excellent Return to Forever jazz fusion anthology. Afterwards I went to Starbucks for a pound of fresh Guatemala Antigua and a sugar free Cinnamon Latte. I then proceeded to one of the benches designated as a husband waiting area. It's where all married men gather to wait for their soon to be arriving, shopping bag overloaded, wives. I quietly and peacefully sat there, sipping my latte and watching people walking around. A large majority of the people I observed were talking on their phones or checking their text messages and emails even if they were with other people. How did we live before cell phones? I think this obsession with staying connected to other people electronically is a thinly veiled indicator of everyone's basic loneliness and deep need to feel connected to others and to be thought of by others. We have a deep fear of losing our connectedness and being alone. I, too, feel this to some degree although it is not an obsession for me. Sometimes I think the more we communicate and the more we are electronically connected, the lonelier we get and the more isolated we feel. What most of us really need is less cell phone time and more face to face human interaction and affection. Let's face it. All most of us want is to be loved by others. That's more important than being "connected". I sometimes joke about Facebook. I tell friends it is a way for me to feel connected while also allowing me to be socially isolated. It's sad, and maybe funny, but true. The individualism of people in our society, the social isolation, and over dependence on electronic connections, creates much of the loneliness so may people feel. The Mall may be a place to spend your money and avoid your loneliness. It may be a place for people to gather in shared loneliness. At it's best, however, it is a place to be with people, have a good meal, drink a latte, talk to an old person sitting on a bench, buy something that makes you happy, and get a Cinnabon to take home for later.

Another Slice of Woodstock

Just when I thought all the musical surprises were over from this past summer's 40th anniversary of the original Woodstock Music Festival, along comes the joy of Joe Cocker's complete performance. Quite unexpectedly it's been released on CD. Most of the last 40 years we've had to content ourselves with his classic performance of "With a Little Help from my Friends" in the Woodstock movie and a few other bits and pieces released here and there. Now we get it all exactly as it went down on that Sunday afternoon in August 1969. Immediately after this performance thousands of dirty hippies got a communal shower from a major summer thunderstorm. In another Woodstock recording that actually includes part of the thunderstorm you can hear a young girl shout "Hey Joe Cocker! Isn't the rain beautiful"! The spirit of Woodstock lives on in the musical performances.

The End Of Another Weekend

It is now Sunday evening. I've had to close my window against the evening chill. It's been a simply gorgeous autumn weekend with cold mornings and warm days. Driving home from dinner tonight there was a noticeable degree of color creeping into the leaves that still cling to the trees. Over the next few weeks I hope they will be even more colorful, not only in my neighborhood, but out on the open road. Next weekend I will be driving to the monastery as well as across the river into southern Indiana where I will be taking my granddaughter out to the pumpkin patches. In a few weeks I will also be traveling along I-64 West to visit my son at St. Meinrad Archabbey and soon after that down I-75 South to eastern Tennessee, home of the Great Smoky Mountains. All of these trips should be in perfect alignment with the ever changing and multi-colored rainbows of autumn in my part of the world.

It's been a quiet and mostly enjoyable weekend. Weekends are always quiet when my granddaughter is not here. I like the quiet and the rest but I always miss her when she is not around. Yesterday was a little frustrating because of some dealings with a home warranty company. I seem to have a home repair warranty that doesn't actually cover any repairs. Every problem I have seems to be an exception to the actual warranty. My warranty doesn't cover repairs unless the problem is caused by solar flares, weapons of mass destruction, nuclear radiation, or an attack by aliens from another planet. I checked the contract and sure enough this was all specified in the small print.

Today I got out of bed about 9:00 AM which is a perfect time on a weekend. I made some coffee, walked outside for my morning paper, and listened to a concert by the progressive rock band called Yes. It was recorded in Amsterdam in 2001 with a full orchestra. Later, throughout the day, I listened to my newly acquired Beatles CD's. I think the Beatles are the greatest and most influential band of all time. Finally in the afternoon I finished a few chores, i.e., laundry, clean up the kitchen, carry some crates to the shed, and pick up some yard waste. My son was home this weekend but now he's back on the road to the seminary so once again the nest is empty. Another work week starts tomorrow...

Pictured above are some of the seasonal decorations in my home courtesy of my wife.

Being In The Moment

Eckhart Tolle, in his book The Power of Now states "The whole essence of Zen is walking on the razor's edge of Now...to be so utterly, so completely present that no problem, no suffering, nothing that is not who you are in your essence, can survive in you. In the Now, in the absence of time, all your problems dissolve. Suffering needs time; it cannot survive in the Now.

Being in the moment requires what may appear as opposite energies working together. To be in the moment one needs focus along with the ability to let go. Being in the moment requires us to focus on the Now while letting go of attachments to the past or daydreams of a perfect future. So many of us are filled with regrets about bad behavior or poor choices that we made in our youth or even in our recent lives. Often it is difficult to let go and leave behind the mistakes of the past. Equally difficult at times is letting go of a romanticized version of the past that never really happened as we think we remember it. In general, life has never been as easy or simple as we thought it was. Looking at my life 30 years ago, when I was 28 years old, with my now 58 year old eyes distorts the reality of how challenging life really was as young, naive, and often financially challenged parent. Even now, as a wiser and older person, I must also let go of my daydreams of a perfect future when today's troubles are behind me, when I no longer have to work, when I have no money problems, when I can do whatever I want whenever I want. Hopefully, I will have some of this but it's not likely to be perfect. Today's troubles will be replaced with tomorrow's challenges. I may be free of today's work grind but I still may need to work a little to supplement my income. It's not likely that my health will get better as I age. I may become one of those retired people who are busier than they have ever been. Life is uncertain so tomorrow's dreams may never happen. The point is that we cannot relive the past and the future is uncertain. What we can do is live well now. Make the most of every moment. Live life as fully as the moment allows. Grab on to the joy of the moment. Today, for example, is about as beautiful as a day can be. I went outside earlier to feel the coolness of the wind and the warmth of the sun. It energized me and I felt one with the moment and with life. As the author Ram Dass says, "Be here now"! Today will be tomorrow's yesterday and we can then let it go. The Now is inexhaustible and will continuously replenish itself. By living in the moment our joy may also be inexhaustible and continuously replenished.

Precious Moments

The combination of busyness and fatigue have prevented me from writing. My granddaughter spent the weekend with my wife and me. One of our activities was getting our Halloween decorations out of my shed. Chloe is a very active, and, from what I am told, a typical five year old. When she is around everything revolves around her. She is a dynamo of activity. If my wife has her attention I can usually sneak away for a moment's rest. When I have her attention, my wife can do the same. Most of the time, however, she prefers my company, especially at the crack of dawn on Sunday mornings. She did go home with her parents on Sunday night but I was back at her house early on Monday morning. There was no school so I volunteered to pick her up and spend the day with her. We had a wonderful time. Most of the morning she sat in my lap and we watched SpongeBob Squarepants and Mickey Mouse on television. We also went out for lunch at McDonald's and played outside in the yard. I love my granddaughter very much and enjoy spending time with her. Although it can be exhausting for a 58 year old man to go toe to toe with the energy and imagination of a five year old I consider every moment with her to be precious. I have a Zen saying on my computer that reads, "What, at this moment, is lacking"? When I am with Chloe, the answer is "nothing". She lives in the Now and when I am with her, love fills up all the space in the Now of my life.

The Ego

I don't have any personal reflections tonight but here's something good from the dailyom website.

Serving the Higher Self
The Ego

In most spiritual circles, the ego gets a pretty bad rap. The reason for this is that the ego, to some extent, is the principle in our psyches that separates us from one another, while spirit is the principle that shows us that no such separation exists. Sometimes the ego is depicted as an almost demonic figure that keeps us from realizing our true nature. But at its most basic, the ego is simply a tool that helps us organize the various aspects of our personality so that we can function in the world. In this sense, the ego is simply a way for us to understand and attend to ourselves at the same time as we understand and attend to the world around us. The ego is a tool that we use to navigate the world.

Perhaps the problem is that the ego sometimes gets out of control. This happens when the higher self loses control of the psyche. The psyche then falls under the leadership of the ego, an entity that was never meant to lead. The ego is meant to be definitively in the service of the higher self. When this relationship is functioning, the ego is a useful intermediary representing the whole self but not thinking that it is the whole self. Then, it is almost as if the ego is the self playfully pretending to be the separate entity called "I." Like an actor, the ego plays the roles that the world asks us to play in order to be part of the program. In this way, the ego can be a tool enabling us to be in the world but not of it.

As long as we are in touch with our higher selves, our egos are not a threat. They are simply useful tools in the service of spirit. We keep our egos in check when we continually nurture our awareness of who we really are. Then our egos are free to serve without trying ineffectually to rule. It is healthy to have ego, but like all things in life, ego functions best when it is in balance and harmony with your whole se

This Is It. Nothing Else Happens

There are no ancients before me, no followers behind,
only the vastness of heaven and earth on this mountain terrace.
Though heaven may know the ultimate, joy or sorrow is our own will.

Today's Tao commentary basically says "We stand alone in this life. No one lives our life for us. Neither drug nor sorcery can remove us, even for a moment, from our own life. We are here alone to engage every precious moment according to our wills. Accept who you are. Be who you are. The future is yet to be made. Let us go forth and make it but let us make it as beautifully as we can. The degree of elegance is determined by our will and the perfection of our own personalities. Therefore, do not sigh over misfortune or adversity. Whether you are happy or sad is entirely up to you".

The first thing I thought of when I read all of this is a story about two monks meditating side by side. One was an old, seasoned monk and the other a young novice. They both sat in silence with their eyes closed. Occasionally, the young novice would open an eye and peek at the older monk. Eventually, the older monk opens his eyes and smiles at the young novice. He gently says, "This is it. Nothing else happens".

A friend of mine, who was formerly one of my teachers, once said, "The moment is as perfect as it can be".

Our lives are as good as they can be in this moment based on our wills and the perfection of our own personalities. Each of us has the power to make the moment as beautiful as we can. One man's hell is another man's heaven. More often than not, the quality of the moment is a perception within our own mind. Whatever is happening is what is happening. How we react and how we perceive it is a matter of our own will. The moment is as perfect as we make it. Some enlightened individuals found beauty even within the confines of a concentration camp. Others can't see beauty even when standing in front of a field of flowers. This moment, whatever is happening, is your life. Whether you are happy or sad is entirely up to you.