Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Fatigue

It is late at night and I have no thoughts. I am barely awake and it is only in a brief moment of having a second wind that I am even able to type. I actually just woke up a little while ago after collapsing in my chair earlier. This being Tuesday, I picked up Chloe at the day care. She was a charged up bundle of energy all night. She's not the kind of child who quietly sits and plays with a few toys. It's like baby sitting a member of the USA Olympic Gymnastic Team who's had a few espressos. She is a child who enjoys running and jumping, especially jumping off furniture and landing on me. Often when she is with me she wants me to hold her hands and swing her in the air. The more I do it, the more she says "Higher, Pa Paw, higher!" By the time she left tonight my wife and I were wasted. I don't really think she's hyper active. She just loves being with my wife and me. We love being with her. Part of the reason she loves me is that I give her a lot of my attention. Besides being Pa Paw, I am just a big kid in her eyes. Tonight Chloe's father picked her up about 90 minutes later than we originally expected. By the time he arrived, his mother wasn't happy. When he walked in the door, she blasted him. Later, she expressed regret to me for jumping down his throat. "Why do I do things like that?", she said. "Do you ever have things you do over and over that drive you crazy?" My immediate response was that we all have such faults. Most of my life I would have been better off if my mouth had been stapled shut. I try to write daily thoughts that are interesting, helpful, and encouraging. I could easily write daily thoughts about all of my weaknesses and faults. In my wife's defense, I know it was normal end of the work day fatigue that caused her to lash out at Chloe's father. I was feeling the same way. She just got to him before I did! In reality they have a very close relationship. My wife is very good to him and to Chloe. Fatigue often brings out the worst in all of us. It's another reason why sleep and rest are so important. With that in mind, I am going to bed now so I am not a grumpy old man at work tomorrow.

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