The Voices Around Us

We hear many voices in our daily lives. Hopefully, most of the voices we hear are positive, affirming, encouraging, and loving and the voices that are negative, critical, and life draining are few and far between. Unfortunately for some people this may be reversed. Sadly, the critical and negative voices can seem like a shout while the more positive voices often seem like a whisper. The voice of God and the voice of love are gentle sounds. Most of the time we may not even hear them because the negative and critical voices can seem so loud that they drown out everything else. This is why it is important to be centered and awake so that the ear of our heart can hear and listen to the gentle voices that remind us that we are loved and that we are good and that we are appreciated. Turn away from the critical and negative voices in your life. Turn your ear and your heart to the voices of those who love you and who build up your life.

The Elf On The Shelf

My wife and I have attended many office Christmas parties over the years. One of her previous employers always had a very nice, dress up affair at one of the better hotels in town. It would start with an open bar, followed by a sit down dinner and dancing. My wife was often the life of the party. One year the open bar lasted too long and she had one too many glasses of wine. We were seated at our table waiting to be served dinner. I wasn't paying attention to her because I was conversing with the person on my left. Denise leaned over and whispered in my ear, "Mike, this is the worst soup I have ever had!" I looked her in the eye and said, "Denise, you're eating the salad dressing!" It was oil and vinegar which can be great on salad but it makes a terrible soup. Our entire table almost fell out of their chairs laughing.

Once again my wife and I have an “Elf on the Shelf” in our home. This is a tradition that we started with our granddaughter last Christmas season. The belief is that the elf has been sent from the North Pole. You can talk to the elf but not touch it. The really fun part is moving the elf around your home when your child or grandchild is not around. This past weekend the elf appeared in my home while my granddaughter was here to spend the night. Before we went to bed she made a small bed for the elf and left it some food. When we went to bed the elf was sitting on a shelf. The next morning, prior to actual daylight, I was awakened by Chloe who immediately said, “Paw Paw, let’s go downstairs and see if the elf is in his bed”. I suggested staying in our bed a little longer but there was going to be none of that. Of course, every time my granddaughter wakes me up at the crack of dawn my wife is hugging the sheets and playing possum. When we finally got downstairs, the elf was sitting on his bed reading a small book. Chloe was freaking out. This is a fun tradition that I highly recommend if you have children in your family. As a sometimes jaded adult it’s great to observe a child who still believes in magic.

The Blur Of The Holidaze

This is the time of year that often becomes a blur. Once Thanksgiving is over life becomes very hectic and often very stressful for many people. On the way to work this morning my wife and I were discussing how our personal family Christmas is already almost out of control. We’ve got too many decorations and we’ve already spent too much money. If you’re not careful Christmas becomes a job or a project instead of a time when you simply enjoy the holiday spirit. Too much is, well, too much. If Christmas is running you ragged and empting your bank account, you’re over doing it. Slow down, breathe, and remind yourself that the value of Christmas is not determined by the quantity of things you do. Having said this, my home looks beautiful. My wife is a female version of Clark Griswold although I am more like Clark's wife who finally said to their daughter, "It's Christmas, Audrey, we're all miserable. My wife puts a lot of effort into making everything beautiful. Christmas preparations at my house have gone fairly well with the exception of an outdoor mechanical Santa and a snowman. In spite of wires and rocks to hold them down, they keep flying off the porch whenever the wind blows. I’m pretty sure they will be going back to the Hobby Lobby sometime this week. Let me close this Christmas rant with one of my favorite Christmas stories about my granddaughter. When she was three or four years old she grabbed one of the Three Wise Men from my Nativity set, looked at me and asked, “Paw Paw, is this the Burger King”? How could that not make you smile?

Breaking Bread

One of the simple joys of my life is going home at the end of the work day, preparing a simple meal, sitting with my wife, eating dinner, and watching the evening news on television. In 37+ years of marriage I estimate that my wife and I have shared approximately 13,500 evening meals in our life together. This doesn’t count all the workday mornings where we each sit in our chairs with our coffee and toast. During these meals together we talk about our family, children, friends, work, world events, and many other things. Sharing a meal together is really not about the food. I know this is true because when our children were still young and living with us we had entire meals that were cooked in a Fry Daddy. Trust me, those meals weren't worth talking about. Whether a meal is shared with family or close friends, it's not usually about the food. It's about being present to one another.

Next Thursday is Thanksgiving Day. I’ll be honest. I’m really not all that crazy about turkey and dressing. I do, however, like the fact that there is a traditional meal associated with this holiday. More importantly for me is the idea behind the holiday. Two important values in my life are gratefulness and being thankful. My life is not perfect but I have been very blessed in my life. Some of this is on a material level. Although I am not rich, I am a long way from poor. The greatest riches in my life, however, have nothing to do with wealth or possessions. I am blessed by having people in my life who love me and care about me. These people are not limited to family. My personal family and my extended family are all great even though they can sometimes make me crazy. In addition to family, though, I am also blessed with good friends, some of whom have been part of my life for most of my life. Everyday life is often a challenge and I occasionally get down in the dumps over all the stupid or mundane activities I must perform. Every day is not a walk in the park. However, I still feel blessed and besides the obvious blessings, I have also been given a sense of wonder, an appreciation for beauty, an awareness of the transcendent, and the ability to enjoy the simple things in life. I am grateful and thankful for my family, my friends, the kind of person I have turned out to be, and for all the other small and simple joys of life.

On Getting Older

I saw an interesting thought on Facebook the other night…

“Children, remember that as you are growing up your parents are growing older”.

I was 27 years old when my oldest son was born. He is now 33 years old. When I was 33 years old I would get on the floor and let him jump on me and beat me up. Now I am 60 years old and I get on the floor with my granddaughter. She doesn’t want to beat me up. She wants me to have tea parties and to play with stuffed animals. When I was 33 years old I would jump up from the floor. Now I must get on all fours, crawl to the sofa, and use it for balance as I slowly get up. I usually do this with some discomfort. I think it is a little disconcerting for children to realize that their parents are getting up in years. My children can’t always accept that I am not the man I used to be. I am slower, weaker, and forgetful. I tire more quickly and my energy level is much lower. Of course, it’s not all bad. I am also kinder, more patient, more tolerant, more compassionate, more understanding, and more relaxed. I have survived much and let much go. I worry less, live more in the moment, and I’m more contemplative. I take nothing for granted, enjoy life as much as possible, and I sometimes get lost in beauty. I also notice that as I am getting older, so are my children. My 82 year old mother has a sixty year old son! The poet, Robert Frost, described life in three words. He wrote that “it goes on”. Yes, it does go forward for all of us at the same pace but we didn’t all start the journey at the same time.

Life Is Like A River

I am loving these windy, blustery days when millions of falling leaves are swirling in the air. I find it interesting and enjoyable anytime the seasons change. I believe our lives also have seasons. With the right attitude the changes in our lives can be just as enjoyable.

Life is like a river. When the river is calm, I float in my inner tube, unaware of the river itself, and I just enjoy all the scenery along the way. When I hit the white water rapids of life I hang on for dear life and hope I survive until the river of life calms down once again. Whether the river is calm or chaotic, it's all the same river. The irony is that it's not even about the river. It's about the journey.

A young fish was swimming along in the water one day. When he came upon an older, wiser, fish he asked, "Where is the ocean?” The older fish responded, "Are you kidding? You're in the ocean! It's all around you!" So it is with God. We are swimming in God's presence. He is all around us. Like the fish in the ocean, in God we live and breathe and have our being.

Christmas On The Horizon

I am not necessarily wild about it but Christmas started appearing at my house over the weekend. My wife is a Christmas nut and there’s no stopping her at this time of the year. We’re not decorated yet, and our fake trees are still in their boxes, but everything is out of the storage shed and laying in whatever room it will finally appear. It was all hands on deck this past weekend, including my granddaughter, so now my house looks like Santa’s workshop after a rare North Pole tornado. Fortunately for me I was excused from the heavy lifting because of my back issues. By the time my wife is done my home will look like a small version of Disneyland at Christmas. Every room on the first floor will have some kind of decoration. We will have three Christmas trees, some seasonal prints hanging on the wall, towels you can’t use in the bathroom, snowman mugs for coffee and hot chocolate, lights on the bushes, and candles in the windows. It’s all quite beautiful but unfortunately we don’t have a special crew of people like Disneyworld or the White House. I’ve learned not to fight it because I will lose. It reminds me of something my granddaughter once said to me. She said, “Paw Paw, your whole house is magic. That’s why I never get tired when I am here”.