Whew! It's been a hectic and busy day. It has not been a bad day but I am feeling a little frazzled and tired. My daughter in law works in my building. A little while ago I left her a note asking if I could go pick up Chloe at the day care. I am missing her. If I don't see her at least once a week, I feel a sense of emptiness. She's a little person but she fills up a lot of space in my life. I have a good life but it would be less good if she didn't exist. Chloe will soon be in the Guiness Book of World Records for being able to completely trash a room faster than any other person I know. She's a whirlwind of activity, curiosity, and unbounded wonder. She's so cute! If you are not a grandparent, I probably sound a little hokey sometimes. However, I believe grandchildren are the reward for all the work and occasional pain of raising your own children. After picking Chloe up at the daycare, we shared a feast of chicken tenders, french fries, and a banana split. Unfortunately, I dripped ice cream on one of my new sweaters.
I was really mad when I got home from work this past Friday. In my mailbox was a citation and fine for $100 for parking my own car on my own lawn. This was not a car with no doors sitting on bricks. It's a nice car and I thought I was being considerate of my neighbors by not parking it on the street and blocking the road. Anyway, I was fired up and I was ready to give someone a piece of my mind. Today I called the agency to complain and possibly be a jerk. My better self kicked in and the person I talked to turned out to be a nice and reasonable guy. In the end, he waived the fine and I was extremely pleased. Sometimes you just need to be calm and talk things out in a reasonable manner. It was a win-win for both of us. I am now informed about an obscure law (his win) and I do not have to pay the fine (my win).
Sometimes I feel like I am not as spiritual as I used to be. I do not seem to be doing as many "spiritual things" as I used to do. From a Zen perspective where up is sometimes down and down is up, I do not know if this is necessarily a bad thing. Are spiritual practices like training wheels on a bike and when you no longer need some of them to stay balanced, you quit using them? Can our spiritual practices be internalized into regular day to day living so that you are no longer consciously aware of them? If everything I have ever read about prayer is true, you can get to a point where you are no longer aware that you are praying. This is the prayer of the heart. Have I actually progressed in the spiritual life? It's not for me to judge. It's for God and others to decide. If I answer my own question and say yes, I will be humbled by the end of the day.
It finally snowed enough last night to cover the ground where I live. My normally gray and bleak looking neighborhood was transformed into a place of beauty. The ground and every tree and bush were covered with about an inch of snow. As I stood on my front porch, the snow was beautiful as it glistened and sparkled from the light coming from the streetlight. It was another perfect moment.
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